Dr Paul Allen

Premarital Sex in America by Mark Regnerus and Jeremy Uecker and was pleasantly surprised at some of the insights. While I have been writing, teaching, and speaking for years to both teens and adults on the issue of premarital sex, this book opened my eyes to some of the more important trends emerging today.  The empirical data suggests that these are not true most of the time. There are exceptions, of course. MYTH 1: Long-term relationships are a thing of the past Many emerging adults (ages 18-23) tend to hold two views in tension—that sexual experimentation is valuable and yet one should not cheat on a monogamous partner. Indeed, many consider it stupid and unhealthy not to be sexually active in various relational settings. And yet most desire a lasting exclusive relationship. According to the research of Regnerus and Uecker, at least 50 percent of marriages last a lifetime, despite what most emerging adults tend to think. MYTH 2: Sex is necessary to maintain a struggling re...

Heterosexual-flag-idea (Photo credit: Wikipedia ) When it comes to sexuality, we Christians are mostly known for what we’re against, instead of what we’re for. For instance, how many times have you heard or read something like this: “All you Christians care about is bashing homosexuals.” Or, perhaps, “All you Christians want to do is impose your morality on other people.” Usually, of course, the morality being referred to is sexual morality . Even the phrase “sexual morality” has a negative feel to it these days. Why is that? I would argue that we Christians have not done a good enough job in describing — and, sadly, living out — a positive vision for human sexuality . It is true that in our overly sexualized culture, there’s plenty to protest: pornography, sleazy advertising, explicit song lyrics, TV shows that glamorize infidelity of every kind. We would be less than Christian if we remained silent. So, we speak out against sexual sin. Got it. But what alternative do we off...